i try my very best to put some effort on every single things.. but still, ada juga orang yang tak boleh satisfy. don't me give that stupid line by saying "oh, this is life. this is how it supposed to be".. boleh blah nak termakan ayat sedapkan hati tu..
come on la.. you said i'm bad at this particular task. i put some effort but then u saw me doing something else and you said i did it wrong. ok, i put some effort as well. i don't mind learning to be better. but, what is the BETTER person or radiographer u expect me to be? it is not ONE task, not TWO, not even THREE. it's more than that! it's like you know me with mistakes. gimme a break~ seriously.
i know, i understand each points you try to tell me. i need to learn to do it better than whatever crap i did before.. u teach, i learn.. but, the feeling that i have now is like
"i come to work everyday, 30 minutes earlier because i know that i have to do a lot of things early in the morning before we can start the day. but one day, i came late but still 15 minutes earlier. u saw me. and u said that i need to come earlier than that to get ready the machine". don't you know that i always come earlier??
semua jenis kesalahan, u said, it's me. because i'm junior? i'm trying to be professional here. but it's too much dah. almost everyday u come to check on me. i do appreciate it. yes, i sincerely do. i want to be better myself. but every single mistakes u claim it on me, i'm tired enough. fed up gila~ macam lah orang lain perfect. salah sikit, siapa yang kena? dan mana nak tahu siapa yang buat? u don't even there before that. when i did it right, u say nothing at all..
kalau boleh uji tahap keikhlasan saya sekarang, it's almost negative. let it be zero, but i don't want it to be negative. please, gimme a break. i want to stay eventhough i lost my passion and excitement dah.. ya Allah, kuatkanlah hati hambaMu ini... Amin~
1 year ago